Stories drive behaviour

We act in ways that agree with our story. If the story is “I’m disorganized,” we subconsciously choose actions that match it. To change actions, we gather new evidence that supports a better story.

Update your story with evidence

  • Shrink the proof. Choose tiny, undeniable wins (“opened the calendar at 9:00,” “wrote one bullet”).
  • Make it visible. Track with a ✓, a streak, or one‑line insight.
  • Say it neutrally. “I’m becoming a person who…” leaves room to grow.

Avoid identity lock‑in (stay flexible)

  • Review weekly. Keep / Kill / Upgrade habits and stories; retire ones that no longer fit your goals.
  • Use situation labels, not character labels. “I missed today” beats “I’m lazy.”
  • Hold identities lightly. Keep the core (“I’m a learner”) and let the methods evolve.

Examples

Work — From overwhelmed to organized

  • Story now: “I’m disorganized.”
  • New story: “I’m becoming the kind of manager who plans clearly.”
  • Evidence votes: 2‑minute top‑3 at 9:15; DOD (Decision—Owner—Deadline) at end of meetings; one calendar review on Friday.

Personal — From ‘not a reader’ to reader

  • Story now: “I never finish books.”
  • New story: “I’m becoming a reader.”
  • Evidence votes: read one paragraph after tea; one highlight; place book on pillow.

Try this now (2 minutes)

Write one old story you want to retire. Replace it with “I’m becoming the kind of person who…”. Do one tiny vote for it today and mark ✓.

FAQ

Won’t changing my story make me fake?
No. You’re not claiming what you haven’t earned—you’re gathering evidence for a better story.

What if others still see the old me?
They catch up to your consistent evidence. Keep stacking votes.

How do I know when to change identities?
During your weekly review, ask: “Is this identity helping or trapping me?” Adjust as needed.